Sex scenes-Fun to read but a headache to write…at times

Well I think my headline says it all.  Sex scenes are almost expected in today’s romancenovels, be it paranormal, or otherwise.  I can’t remember the last time I read a romance novel that didn’t have one and to be honest I would probably be stunned if I happened upon one minus the heat.  With that said, no matter how fun or stimulating they are to read, writing one can be a pain in the posterior.

Now, I don’t think a novel has to have sex in it to be successful.  I love reading books that areclassified as young adult reads.  The Twilight Saga is by far one of my favorite series (I have a Cullen Crest tattooed on my wrist), and I absolutely love Scott Westerfeld’s Uglies Series.  Neither one of them is heavy on the sex by any means.  Bella and Edward’s long awaited coming together is pretty tame compared to what I find in my paranormal romances and urban fantasies (and what I write) and I thought it was very appropriate for the genre.  So while I can very much enjoy a book without all the bumping nasty, I do think the racy scenes are necessary if the situation and the genre calls for it.

But while I think they are necessary in the right setting, I have the hardest time writing them sometimes.  I found myself either eliminating them all together or leaving them till last.  I skipped ahead and finished Crimson Dawn and let it sit for three months before I found the mojo to write Val and Irulan’s first time together.  Part of it was because I thought that the words I was going to put on the paper wouldn’t do the scene I had in my head justice.  And part of it was because I didn’t know where to start.

There was no lack of personal experiences to draw from, I was just coming up blank.  Once I finally bit the bullet and sat down to write it, I realized that those blanks I kept drawing were because of issues with terminology.  Love scenes have to fit the characters and using the wrong word just kills the mood for me.  Val was opening herself up to a new experience so she wouldn’t use some of the harsher words used to describe…well I hope you know what I mean.  (And if you don’t then drop me a line and I’ll fill you in.  But for this post I’m gonna try and keep it pg.)  But in the same token, she was sure of what and who she wanted, so she wouldn’t shy away from expressing herself.  Her actions and words had to convey both of those points.  I took to Google to find more creative ways to say what I wanted.  I found plenty of blog post and articles but still had trouble getting my words right.

So there I was, still  struggling to write a sex scene and describe my characters bodies and actions without making my novel sound vulgar or trashy, or even worse cheesy as all get out.  I went back and read some of my favorite scenes from books I had read.  They ranged from sensual to spicy to down right scorching.  With all those for inspiration I sat back down and started again with no luck.  Everything I wrote either sounded to silly or too crude for my heroines.  For all my wanting to write the scene and knowing that having them come together was a perfect fit for the story I was telling; I just couldn’t find the right words no matter what I did.

My scene eluded me until I called my cousin one night to pour out my heartache at my inability to write the scene.  I pouted and complained and bashed my abilities as a writer for close to twenty minutes until my cousin finally burst into laughter.  I wasn’t sure what I was expecting when I called her, but laughter wasn’t it.  Once she got over herself and calmed down, she reminded me of all the sex scenes that I used to write in high-school and how easily I churned them out. (long story, maybe I’ll tell it to you guys sometime in the future)

I laughed at the memory and remembered how much fun I had coming up with them.  Once I voiced that, my cousin said, “Bingo, you had fun.  Sounds like you’ve tried to hard to make the scene perfect, you’ve forgotten to have fun while you write it.”  And she was right.  I love writing. I sit at my computer with my music blasting and throw myself into a story no matter what it is.  But when it came to that scene I put too much thought into it and made it a chore instead of something fun.

Once I got over myself, the scene, appropriate terminology and all, practically wrote itself.  Once I was done I wondered what all the internal fuss was about in the first place.  I had given myself many a headache for nothing and silly me has gone and done it again.

In my last post I gave readers a small preview of my latest DarkWorld story titled, Faerie Wishes and Jaguar Kisses.  I am very pleased to say that it is 98 percent done and the cover art is almost complete as well.  It’s firmly on track for uploading to Amazon by next Thursday.  Why is it only 98 percent done do you ask?  Well it’s because of a pesky sex scene that refused to come to me.  After jumping that hurdle with Crimson Dawn, I had no problems whatsoever writing the scenes for Ascension, and a few other short stories in between, but once I got to the scene for Faerie Wishes, my brain turned to mush again.  I have written and edited everything twice but the love scene between the two main characters.

I thought that I’d be 100 percent done with it by today but when I sat down to write last week that one last little bit proved to be a headache.  I stepped away from the story for the weekend and told myself that I would start fresh Monday.  Well Monday came and went and the headache only got bigger.  I text my ex and asked her if she thought I should just leave it out all together.  She text me back and told me to quit stalling and get over it already.  And then she, like my cousin a few years ago reminded me to just have a fun and quit thinking so hard.

After I was done texting, I sat back down to write but instead of the scene, this post started taking shape.  I got it halfway done and then went back to my story.  JACKPOT!  It was only after writing this post and reminding myself to remember what I found fun about said scenes, was I able to go back and commit to it.  The 95 percent completion that I had on Friday has grown to 98 and by the time that you read this I will be well on my way towards 100.

Dang gone sex scenes.  Fun to read but a headache to write at times…if a writer lets them become one.

I’ll be back Friday with another preview of Faerie Wishes and Jaguar Kisses.  To read about that story and any other titles in my DarkWorld, including Crimson Dawn: Darklife Saga Bk 1, you can check out my posts  on http://frogenyozurt.com/ or head over to mywebsite, http://www.ronniemassey.com/ .